Threads of Gratitude: What Remains At The Table

The aroma of roasted turkey drifts through the air, rich and inviting, intertwined with the warm, spicy notes of cinnamon and cloves. Beyond the window, the November sky stretches pale and wintry, bare branches reaching skyward while golden leaves scatter softly across the ground like whispered secrets.

Inside, the table overflows with steaming bowls and heaping platters, laughter bubbling warmly above the rhythmic clink of silverware. A child’s small hand stretches eagerly toward a towering mound of mashed potatoes, while across the table, an uncle leans back in his chair, its creak punctuating the start of a well-worn tale.

Groans and grins ripple through the room as his story unfolds. These moments, vibrant and brimming with life, etch themselves into the heart, like sunlight preserved in glass. Yet, like seasons turning, they inevitably change. The table grows smaller, the faces fewer, the rhythm quieter but no less meaningful.

Nostalgia rises not with the sharp sting of loss but with the soft ache of remembering. The gatherings may look different now—fewer voices, or perhaps new traditions—but the gratitude for those memories remains steady. What was shared then carries forward, shaping today in quiet, unspoken ways.

As Ann Voskamp (2011) writes in One Thousand Gifts, it’s the unnoticed details—the golden slant of light, the quiet hum of family—that ground us in gratitude. Her practice of listing blessings transforms fleeting moments into moments of meaning, reminding us that “life-changing gratitude doesn’t take hold unless it is anchored one specific moment at a time.” It is through these small, deliberate acts of noticing that the beauty of the present unfolds.

Robert Emmons and Joanna Hill (2016) delve into this idea in The Little Book of Gratitude. Gratitude doesn’t require life to be perfect, they explain, nor does it depend on constant happiness. Instead, it invites us to accept life as it comes—layered with joy, marked by sadness, and rich with meaning. Even the simplest pleasures—a kind word, the aroma of fresh coffee—can steady us when life feels uncertain. Gratitude, they suggest, isn’t about the size of what we remember but the simple, gentle practice of remembering itself.

This connection between memory, gratitude, and nostalgia is echoed by Constantine Sedikides and Tim Wildschut (2018), who describe nostalgia as a bridge connecting the past to the present. Sitting at a Thanksgiving table, it is easy to see how traditions—stories retold, recipes passed down—carry forward the richness of what came before.

Nostalgia, they argue, isn’t mere sentimentality—it is about discovering deeper meaning in our memories. While sentimentality often romanticizes the past, nostalgia creates a richer, more intentional connection, helping us engage with the past in a meaningful way.

Even small, everyday rituals can become anchors of gratitude. Research published in The Journal of Positive Psychology found that noticing three simple blessings each day—whether the first sip of coffee or a kind exchange with a stranger—significantly increased well-being (Seligman et al., 2018).

It is not the magnitude of what is appreciated but the act of appreciating itself that makes the difference. Gratitude, practiced daily, turns even the smallest moments into something meaningful.

Memories of the Thanksgiving table often drift back at unexpected times, carrying both the warmth of connection and the gentle weight of change. The faces around the table may shift, the voices may soften, but the essence remains.

The stories retold, the laughter shared, even the quiet moments of reflection—they continue, woven into the present. Gratitude does not erase what is different or lost. Instead, it expands to hold both the joy of what was and the beauty of what is.

Gratitude is also not about recreating what was; it is about honoring it through today’s quiet joys. In the glow of a candle or the taste of a familiar recipe, we find the threads of memory and connection, weaving the past and present into something lasting. It is these small joys that remind us: what remains is enough.

References

  • Emmons, R. A., & Hill, J. (2016). The little book of gratitude: Create a life of happiness and well-being by giving thanks. Gaia.
  • Sedikides, C., & Wildschut, T. (2018). Finding meaning in nostalgia. Psychological Review. https://doi.org/10.1037/gpr0000109
  • Seligman, M. E. P., Steen, T. A., Park, N., & Peterson, C. (2018). Positive psychology progress: Empirical validation of interventions. The Journal of Positive Psychology.
  • Voskamp, A. (2011). One thousand gifts: A dare to live fully right where you are. Zondervan.

A Corner of Connection: Finding Belonging Through Words

Quinn’s fifth-grade year began with a rhythm of quiet routines and unnoticed struggles. Living with Spastic Cerebral Palsy often made new experiences feel like stepping into a room where no seat was saved for her—a mix of hesitation and exhaustion. One day, however, an unassuming invitation quietly shifted her view on belonging—not with drama or triumph, but through the gentle nudge of possibility.

A Corner of Connection

The school cafeteria buzzed with energy during the annual activity fair. Tables crowded the space, each adorned with bright posters vying for attention: robotics, debate, soccer, baking—and so much more. Overlapping conversations and bursts of laughter created a wall of sound that made Quinn instinctively clutch her bag tighter near the doorway.

Noise was Quinn’s greatest adversary, turning the world into an overwhelming blur. Still, she lingered, scanning the room for a place where she might fit—or at least not stand out. The robotics table intrigued her; its quiet, logical precision seemed judgment-free. However, the thought of managing wires and soldering irons with unsteady hands made her hesitate. Debate felt even less inviting—a whirlwind of rapid-fire arguments she couldn’t imagine keeping pace with.

Then, she noticed a table tucked in the back, its plain banner reading: Creative Writing Club: Tell Your Story. A teacher with kind eyes and an easy smile waved her over.

“Do you like to write?” the teacher asked, her voice calm and steady against the clamor. Quinn hesitated, her fingers brushing the table’s edge. Writing had always been her quiet escape—a way to tame the chaos in her mind. Sharing it felt risky, almost like giving a piece of herself away.

“It’s pretty relaxed,” the teacher assured her. “You don’t have to share unless you want to, and there’s no wrong way to do it.”

By the end of the afternoon, Quinn’s name was on the sign-up sheet. She couldn’t quite explain why, but for the first time in a long while, the static in her mind seemed a little less oppressive.

Words Take Shape

The club’s first meeting was relaxed—just a handful of students gathered in a loose circle, notebooks and laptops open. The teacher began with a simple prompt: “Write about a memory that makes you smile.”

Quinn stared at the laptop screen and her shaky handwritten notes, the noise in her mind pressing in, louder than before. Slowly, her fingers found their rhythm on the keyboard. She wrote about her brother teaching her to bake cookies and the chaos that followed when they accidentally doubled the salt in the dough.

When the teacher invited volunteers to share, Quinn surprised herself by raising her hand. Her voice trembled as she read, but the group listened intently.

When she finished, a student across the circle glanced up with a small smile and said, “That was great—it felt like I was right there,” his tone quiet but thoughtful. Quinn’s cheeks flushed, a blend of pride and uncertainty bringing warmth to her face.

Over the weeks, the club became a space where Quinn felt at ease. She wrote stories and poems, her confidence growing with each meeting. In that circle, Cerebral Palsy didn’t define her; she was simply a writer, her thoughts finding shape in the words she shared.

Re-imagining Inclusion

Quinn’s experience highlights a deeper truth about inclusion. True inclusion, as Booth and Ainscow (2020) describe, is about more than just creating spaces—it’s about embedding diversity into shared experiences. In this context, diversity means embracing the different perspectives, backgrounds, and experiences that everyone brings to the table. It’s about recognizing what makes each person unique and making sure those differences are valued and included, so everyone feels respected and part of the group.

Creative writing was a natural fit for Quinn. The club emphasized personal expression over speed or physical precision, making it a level playing field for all participants. Johnstone (2018) notes that storytelling amplifies voices that might otherwise go unheard, giving individuals a platform to connect and be understood.

Unlike more structured or competitive activities, the writing club offered Quinn and the other students a sense of freedom through its flexibility. There were no rigid expectations or comparisons—just the space to explore thoughts and emotions through writing. This approach echoes Meyer et al. (2016), who highlight the value of environments that encourage self-paced growth and genuine connections. The club’s open structure empowered each participant to express themselves authentically, on their own terms.

Belonging Without Barriers

The writing club didn’t bring about a dramatic or sudden change in Quinn’s life. Instead, it offered something quieter yet just as meaningful—a place where she could belong, without the need for explanation or adjustment.

One Thursday, as she packed her notebook and laptop, Quinn found herself smiling as she called out, “See you next week.” The words were simple, but they carried the weight of recognition. In that space, she had discovered something profound: belonging was not about fitting into someone else’s mold but being valued for who she was.

In the quiet circle of the club, Quinn found more than a love for writing. She discovered the power of being seen, heard, and embraced—a reminder that true inclusion begins where every voice is welcomed.


References
  • Booth, T., & Ainscow, M. (2020). The Index for Inclusion: A Guide to Developing Learning and Participation in Schools. Centre for Studies on Inclusive Education.
  • Johnstone, B. (2018). Discourse Analysis. Cambridge University Press.
  • Meyer, A., Rose, D. H., & Gordon, D. (2016). Universal Design for Learning: Theory and Practice. CAST Professional Publishing.

Exploring “Echoes in the Shatter”

Transformation is rarely gentle. It is an experience both familiar and unknown, much like standing at the ocean’s edge. There is a rhythm, a back-and-forth, yet the way forward is often elusive.

In writing Echoes in the Shatter, I was drawn to the imagery of waves—breaking, mending, shifting. These movements reflect how change is experienced: not all at once, but in fragments, echoes, and as an ongoing process.


Echoes in the Shatter

The sky wears its mourning in layered hues,
Gray light bruises to black—an endless ruse.

A roar shakes the bones of silence to fray,
Waves weaving blue and black in their sway.

The rocks, jagged, like truths left unsaid,
Pierce through the foam where dreams have bled.
I stand, or am I a shadow here?
The ocean unravels; I disappear.

The wave breaks—
On rock. On air.
A shatter as ancient as time’s decree.
Each fragment a whisper, a truth unbound,
Gray to black, to blue profound.

Am I the storm, or the calm it denies?
A howl that divides, or what division ties?
The wave breaks,
Splinter into shards the tide won’t deny.

The sky wears its mourning in layered hues,
Gray light bruises to black—an endless ruse.

The ocean unravels; all disappears.

The wave breaks—
On rock. On air. On time.
A shatter that hums the horizon’s rhyme.


Finding Meaning in the Layers

Echoes in the Shatter is about transformation, especially when it comes to identity and change. A line that resonates is:


“The sky wears its mourning in layered hues,
Gray light bruises to black—an endless ruse,” it suggests complexity rather than sadness.

The sky reflects how change isn’t just one emotion, but a mix of resistance, adaptation, and release.

The Dual Nature of Challenges

The waves breaking “on rock, on air” show how challenges vary. Some are solid and unmovable, others are subtle but still there. Identity, particularly in the context of disability, is shaped by both struggle and growth (Goodley et al., 2019).

Tension and Reflection

“Am I the storm, or the calm it denies?” explores the balance between action and reflection. The storm is force and upheaval, while the calm invites quiet contemplation. Margaret Price’s “crip spacetime” shows how transformation doesn’t follow a straight line—it’s a messy, non-linear experience (Price, 2024).

Dismantling and Renewal

“The ocean unravels; all disappears” hints at how transformation is both destruction and creation. It’s about making space for what comes next.

Echoes in the Shatter” reflects on those in-between moments where breaking and becoming meet. The rhythm of the ocean remains steady, but its form keeps changing, just like life.

The echoes of change linger, like the fading sound of waves—a transformation still unfolding. Each wave represents ongoing change. What is broken doesn’t disappear, it shifts and creates space for growth.

Transformation isn’t a one-time thing but a constant process. The past always leaves pieces behind, but they help shape what’s coming next. The power lies in the tension between what is lost and what is found.

To rebuild, destruction is often necessary. Through this, resilience is forged—a reminder that loss makes space for renewal. The poem serves as a reminder that even in loss, there is rebirth, offering the quiet promise that transformation, though difficult, ultimately leads to something new.


References

  • Goodley, D., Lawthom, R., Liddiard, K., & Runswick-Cole, K. (2019). Key concerns for critical disability studies. International Journal of Disability and Social Justice, 1(1), 27-49.
  • Price, M. (2024). Crip spacetime: Access, failure, and accountability in academic life. Duke University Press.
  • Garland-Thomson, R. (2020). Becoming disabled: Narratives of transformation and identity. Oxford University Press.

Unbound Voices: The Quiet Power of Self-Trust and Purpose

There’s a tension that arises when your voice meets silence or when you’re misunderstood. It doesn’t just pass by—it reaches inward, testing your sense of worth and belonging.

Often sparked by others’ biases or doubts, this feeling can lead to a choice: quiet your voice or hold it steady. In these moments, self-trust becomes an anchor, something steady and unbreakable, free from the need for validation. This piece is, in part, a response to Voice Unbound: Rediscovering and Reclaiming My True Voice, a post from Wiley’s Walk that explores the deep impact of finding and trusting one’s voice even when it stands alone.

For those who know what it feels like to be unseen or misinterpreted, this “voice unbound” is as vital as it is freeing. It doesn’t need to be understood by everyone to be worth holding onto. The journey to reclaim it is subtle and complex—a quiet process of building the inner resolve to keep showing up fully, whether or not the world is ready to meet you there.

The experience of feeling misunderstood is not unique. Disability advocate Keah Brown writes about it in The Pretty One (2019), where she shares how her self-worth isn’t built on others’ approval but on embracing her own life fully. For Brown, strength isn’t about others seeing her but about trusting her own truth, even if the world responds with indifference. Her self-worth becomes a steady, inner resolve to keep moving forward, regardless of the assumptions or misunderstandings surrounding her (Brown, 2019).

A Quiet Resolve

Strength often arrives quietly, without grand gestures. Sometimes, it’s simply the resolve to stay grounded in what feels true, even when it goes unseen by others.

Those navigating hidden challenges know this well. For people with disabilities, the world often fails to make space, and unspoken assumptions can cloud even the clearest intentions. Yet in these moments, a quiet resilience emerges—a strength that holds firm, independent of others’ acknowledgment.

This resolve is echoed in Judy Heumann’s reflections in Being Heumann. A lifelong advocate for disability rights, Judy Heumann describes purpose not as an external achievement but as something grounded in connection and inclusion.

Her purpose, she notes, didn’t depend on others’ recognition; it was anchored in her own values and commitment to others. This kind of purpose isn’t about proving anything to anyone else—it’s simply something she chose to live out, quietly and fully (Heumann & Joiner, 2020).

Redefining Purpose Beyond Productivity

For many, purpose doesn’t come from measurable success or productivity. Purpose often blooms in quieter spaces—in the depth of a relationship, in a creative moment, or in sharing something meaningful. For people living with chronic illness and other disabilities, purpose may look nothing like society’s traditional expectations, yet it’s no less real.

All the Weight of Our Dreams, edited by Lydia X. Z. Brown, redefines purpose by challenging narrow ideas of worth, presenting it as something that arises from fully and freely living one’s own story. Here, purpose is about living authentically rather than pursuing external achievements (Brown, 2017).

Judy Heumann, too, describes purpose in a way that isn’t bound by others’ expectations. For her, purpose is about being part of something larger than herself, about belonging to a community of shared values and progress. It is about connection and impact, not recognition. Heumann shows that purpose can be something simple yet deeply fulfilling, a sense of self that doesn’t need external approval to feel complete.

Finding Voice Through Connection

Sometimes, the power of a voice isn’t in how loudly it stands alone but in how it resonates with others. For those who often feel unseen or misinterpreted, finding a space where others truly understand can be grounding. In these shared spaces, voices don’t just exist in isolation; they connect, grow, and create something that transcends individual experience.

In her memoir, Haben: The Deafblind Woman Who Conquered Harvard Law, Haben Girma reflects on the profound role of meaningful connections in shaping her journey. Born deafblind, Girma describes how finding a community that understood her experiences gave her a vital foundation—a place where her voice was embraced and respected (Girma, 2019)​.

Through these connections, she illustrates how resilience often grows quietly, rooted in empathy and shared experiences. Here, listening becomes more than just hearing; it is an act of respect, a where each voice finds value, even when it’s subtle (Girma, 2019)​.

In these spaces, listening is the foundation. It isn’t about trying to be heard or seen; it’s about connecting deeply. Listening—both to ourselves and to each other—creates resilience, grounding each person in an empathy that doesn’t need outside approval.

When voices are silenced or identities are questioned, reclaiming that voice requires personal courage. It is a quiet, resolute choice—one that’s not about seeking approval but about staying true to oneself despite outside opinions. Trusting in one’s own voice isn’t meant to change others’ minds or shift their perceptions. Rather, it’s about honoring a truth that stands on its own, whether or not others understand it.

In Being Heumann, Judy Heumann shows the strength of her inner resolve. Reclaiming her voice wasn’t about fitting in or changing how others saw her. It was about staying true to a purpose that didn’t need outside approval. Her story reminds us that self-trust can be quiet yet unwavering, a decision held firmly without expectation.

Reflecting on this, one question remains: what does it really mean to stay true to ourselves and speak up, even when others may not fully hear us? Maybe it’s about trusting, listening, and sharing anyway—understanding that every voice has weight, matters, even if it’s only partly understood.


References

  • Brown, K. (2019). The Pretty One: On Life, Pop Culture, Disability, and Other Reasons to Fall in Love with Me. Atria Books.
  • Brown, L. X. Z. (Ed.). (2017). All the Weight of Our Dreams: On Living Racialized Autism. DragonBee Press.
  • Girma, H. (2019). Haben: The Deafblind Woman Who Conquered Harvard Law. Twelve.
  • Heumann, J., & Joiner, K. (2020). Being Heumann: An Unrepentant Memoir of a Disability Rights Activist. Beacon Press.

Voice Unbound: Rediscovering and Reclaiming My True Voice


The sting of disbelief still lingers. I recall standing there, motionless, as my teacher’s harsh words pierced the classroom silence: “Kerry, you couldn’t have written this.”

That single sentence felt like everything unraveling at once—a complete dismissal of all I had invested. Hours of effort, each word carefully chosen and every sentence meticulously crafted, erased in an instant. The accusation hung thick in the air, wrapping doubt around my words as though they belonged to someone else.

The classroom lights buzzed overhead, their cold fluorescence casting a harsh glare. The air smelled faintly of chalk and anxiety, making me feel isolated despite the crowded room. My classmates’ eyes darted down, pencils fidgeting against notebooks. No one met my gaze as the teacher’s words echoed, an accusation branded onto my spirit. My mind raced to defend myself, but the words froze, stuck somewhere between disbelief and shame.

Maybe my words didn’t sound like mine at all.

This wasn’t just about the writing itself; it was about my voice, the authenticity of each thought I had painstakingly put down. The piece had been a reflection of my work, now suddenly that effort felt hollow. Every chosen phrase and meticulous revision had been stripped of meaning by a single judgment. The classroom air felt heavy, tight with silence where trust or encouragement might have been.

Back at home, the atmosphere shifted as my family enveloped me in warmth and reassurance. “You know your own work. Don’t let someone else’s doubt drown out your voice,” they reminded me. Their support steadied me, affirming that the effort and every word was mine. Yet, even their encouragement couldn’t fill the hollow absence left by that one missing ally in the room. I had needed someone to stand beside me, to see the words as I had, to trust the voice behind them.

Gradually, the sting of accusation and rejection faded, and was replaced by a quiet question: Could I trust this voice, my voice, even if no one else did? This question lingered, urging me to understand what it truly means to believe in myself. Trust doesn’t demand attention; it appears when you choose to keep going, even when it feels futile and doubt is near.

Each time I picked up my pen and wrote another line, my voice grew stronger, steadier, like roots finding their way through stone. Slowly, the voice I had almost abandoned began to feel like my own again. In reclaiming it, I found a new purpose: to support others as they find their voices too.

I began to understand that some of the most powerful choices are quiet ones—to be present, to listen, to honor someone’s story without judgment. It’s about seeing others clearly, even when they can’t yet see themselves. Imagine a friend sharing a story, something fragile and untested.

In that moment, you have a choice: to listen fully or let it pass. Listening deeply, without rushing to respond, tells them: Your voice matters. Or think of someone passed over because they don’t fit the mold. Recognizing their worth becomes an act of quiet trust.

These small choices create something lasting—a foundation of trust and belief, built one quiet moment at a time. It doesn’t need to be seen; it asks only that we show up, listen, and help others learn to trust their own voices.

Real learning, I’ve realized, often lives in these quiet acts. It goes beyond classrooms and tests. True understanding comes from setting aside our own perspectives to make room for others. By doing so, we allow them to be heard as they are. Growth happens when we take the time to see through someone else’s eyes, honoring their experience without rushing to respond. In each moment of listening, another voice finds its place.

Looking back, I understand that finding one’s voice isn’t about breaking silence but about having the courage to listen—to yourself and to others—in quiet moments. That sting of disbelief became a catalyst for resilience, turning my voice into something steadier and stronger. It sparked a belief in myself I hadn’t fully known, and with it, a purpose: to stand beside others as they uncover and strengthen their own voices.

In the end, finding your voice isn’t about being loud; it’s about the courage to keep going, to listen deeply even when it’s hard. That moment of doubt with my teacher taught me not just to trust in my own voice but to help others find theirs. By being there for each other, we create a space where every voice matters.

Shapes of Courage


The reunion hall was filled with laughter and voices, faces blending into a buzzing crowd. I stood back, watching, feeling a quiet uncertainty I couldn’t shake, as though my life had slipped off course.

Then, across the room, I saw Sarah—a friend whose calm strength I’d long admired. Her presence here was unexpected, and she seemed unchanged, moving through the crowd at her own steady pace. Sarah had always faced life’s challenges with quiet resilience, never asking for attention or applause, just pressing forward, true to her values. Her courage, I realized, was a kind that didn’t need to be seen to be real.

As I watched her, I started to rethink what courage looked like. It wasn’t just in bold actions or grand gestures. Sometimes, it was in a steady step or a calm presence, in staying true to oneself even when no one else noticed. Sarah’s quiet persistence showed me that courage could exist without needing an audience.

Feeling inspired, I wrote a poem about this kind of strength:


Shapes of Courage
By Kerry A. Wiley

Bravery wears no single form—
it’s shapeless, shifting, thin.
It is found in steps we cannot see,
in battles kept within.

Strength can live in stillness, too,
not only in the fight;
it moves beneath what others know,
not always bound to sight.

For some, it’s speaking through the noise,
for others, silence held—
courage wears its secret face,
in voices never quelled.

Sometimes it’s holding to the ground,
sometimes letting go,
sometimes naming shadows there
and truths we cannot show.

It can mean refusing walls,
or making peace with them—
or bending in the quiet dark,
or finding light again.

It’s woven in the way we move,
in whispers, waves, and tides—
bravery the quiet pulse
that settles deep inside.

So here’s to strength that wears no name,
that breaks or lets us be,
a courage that remakes itself,
untethered, wild, and free.


Until then, I’d thought of courage as something bold and unmistakable, something you couldn’t miss. But watching Sarah, I saw courage could also be quieter, private, but no less powerful. I realized that courage could be as soft as it was strong.

This moment inspired Shapes of Courage. I wanted to honor a kind of bravery that doesn’t draw attention—a quiet resilience that carries people through their everyday struggles. In the poem, I tried to reflect how courage isn’t just a bold act but can also be a quiet, lasting strength.

Lines like “shapeless, shifting, thin… found in steps we cannot see, in battles kept within” were written for people like Sarah. Disability scholars like Clare (2020) and Wendell (2019) remind us that courage isn’t always about grand gestures; for many, it’s the small choices to keep going, even when no one notices.

When I wrote “strength can live in stillness, too, not only in the fight,” I wanted to capture this quieter form of resilience. Siebers (2018) describes this hidden strength, often missed because it doesn’t fit traditional images of bravery. Sometimes, though, courage is simply staying steady, a persistence that deserves to be honored.

In Shapes of Courage, I wanted to explore how we face limits and live with them. Goodley (2017) suggests resilience isn’t about overcoming every obstacle; it’s about learning to live alongside them. Shakespeare (2018) writes of resilience as a balance between holding on and letting go. My poem pays tribute to this kind of strength, courage that adapts and meets us where we are.

In the final lines, “strength that wears no name” refers to courage beyond recognition. Siebers (2018) notes that the courage tied to disability often goes unrecognized because it doesn’t fit the usual idea of bravery. Yet this hidden courage matters; it exists without needing an audience.

Writing Shapes of Courage changed how I understand courage. Disability research encourages us to look beyond visible acts of resilience and recognize the strength found in everyday, quiet decisions (Goodley, 2017; Clare, 2020; Siebers, 2018). Through this piece, I hope to honor that quiet, unbreakable courage that shapes lives, even when it passes unseen or unnoticed through a crowded room.


References

  • Clare, E. (2020). Brilliant Imperfection: Grappling with Cure. Duke University Press.
  • Goodley, D. (2017). Disability Studies: An Interdisciplinary Introduction. Sage Publications.
  • Shakespeare, T. (2018). Disability: The Basics. Routledge.
  • Siebers, T. (2018). Disability Theory. University of Michigan Press.
  • Wendell, S. (2019). The Rejected Body: Feminist Philosophical Reflections on Disability. Routledge.

Cultivating Grace

Grace often feels elusive, like trying to catch raindrops or hold snowflakes. Over time, I’ve come to see grace as a steady support during life’s uncertainties and challenges.

In childhood, grace was natural and effortless. Hurts and disappointments didn’t linger; trusting and forgiving came easily. Letting go happened instinctively, without the burden of past hurts.

As I transitioned into adulthood, the simplicity of grace became more complex. Life’s disappointments lingered longer, requiring me to actively choose grace instead of it being an automatic response. Grace is no longer automatic but a deliberate practice developed through challenges and setbacks. Accepting imperfections requires effort, turning grace into a cultivated strength.

Grace does not appear during easy times. Instead, it emerges in our darkest moments, reminding us that every stumble offers a chance to start anew. Embracing grace means seeing life honestly, recognizing both its beauty and flaws, and holding space for both. It takes courage to acknowledge, “This is hard, but I’m still here,” and to find peace in that resilience.

Living with Cerebral Palsy has deepened my understanding of grace. It is not a fragile or passive quality but a resilient strength, especially on days when expectations can feel overwhelming. As a child, I never considered my limitations, but as I grew, I became aware of how the world measures abilities and sets standards. Embracing grace has been essential in honoring my unique journey and finding beauty in its rhythm, even when it differs from others.

Through each challenge and setback, grace has become the resolve that keeps me grounded on tough days. It is the inner voice that says, “Yes, this is hard, but I’m still moving forward.” When frustration arises, grace helps me see my strength and gives me the determination to say, “This is challenging, but I am here.”

Practicing grace means embracing patience and acceptance. It allows for mistakes and releases the need to adhere to others’ timelines, creating a sense of freedom. Grace doesn’t demand flawless progress but supports moving forward and recognizing challenges.

Everyday actions can reflect grace in many forms, such as staying calm during tough conversations or reaching out to mend relationships despite discomfort. This kind of grace requires humility—overlooking flaws, offering forgiveness, and letting go of past hurts to preserve peace. It recognizes that life is inherently messy. Ultimately, grace is a steady peace that carries us through life’s challenges.

Grace also means embracing my journey with its unpredictable twists and varied terrain, approaching each step with intention. By choosing grace, it becomes a guiding strength, propelling me forward one imperfect step at a time.

Invisible, but Not Imaginary: Bridging Awareness and Understanding of Hidden Disabilities

When people think of disabilities, the common image that often comes to mind is something visible—someone using a white cane, a person with a prosthetic limb, or an individual walking with crutches. However, what happens when the challenges a person faces are hidden from view? This is the reality for millions of people living with invisible disabilities—conditions that significantly affect daily life without showing any outward physical signs.

Though these individuals may look perfectly healthy, their conditions can deeply affect how they interact with others and navigate their environments. The absence of visible cues often leads to misunderstanding or dismissal of their needs, making their challenges even harder to manage.

Invisible disabilities encompass a wide range of conditions, from chronic illnesses to mental health disorders, learning disabilities, and neurological conditions. The hidden nature of these disabilities often compels individuals to explain or clarify their experiences, a task that can be both exhausting and frustrating. (Miller, 2022).

Understanding the Hidden Challenges

Living with an invisible disability means managing conditions that aren’t easily seen by others. For example, a person with fibromyalgia might endure intense pain and exhaustion, yet because there are no visible symptoms, they may be expected to function without extra support. In the same way, someone with severe anxiety might seem calm externally, while battling overwhelming thoughts and emotions internally.

Invisible disabilities span a wide variety of conditions. These can include chronic pain disorders like lupus, neurological conditions like ADHD or autism, and mental health diagnoses such as depression and bipolar disorder. Even though the effects of these conditions may not be outwardly visible, they can significantly affect daily life (Miller, 2022; Haegele & Hodge, 2016).

For example, emotional regulation—essentially being able to manage and respond to emotions in a balanced way—can be especially difficult for people with anxiety or autism. The absence of visible symptoms often leads to misunderstanding, which can further compound the challenges people face in obtaining the support they need (Miller, 2022).

The Difficulty of Understanding What Can’t Be Seen

A key obstacle in understanding invisible disabilities is the historical association between disability and visible signs. Disabilities have traditionally been linked to observable conditions that can be easily identified and accommodated. However, when no physical signs are present, individuals often encounter doubt or disbelief. Comments like “You don’t look ill” are frequently directed at individuals coping with chronic conditions (Haegele & Hodge, 2016).

This skepticism can pressure individuals to explain their condition or meet expectations that don’t match their reality. For instance, someone with anxiety may avoid social events, which others may interpret as disinterest, when in fact, they are managing over-stimulation. This gap between how others perceive them and their actual experience can cause feelings of isolation and frustration (Santuzzi et al., 2017).

The the consequences of skepticism extend beyond frustration. When individuals feel disbelieved or dismissed, it adds emotional stress to their already complex health situations and may discourage them from seeking help. This can worsen their conditions or delay much-needed accommodations, intensifying the challenges they face each day (Haegele & Hodge, 2016).

Barriers to Accommodation and Inclusion

The invisibility of these disabilities presents unique challenges in accessing appropriate accommodations. In schools and public spaces, support is often designed for visible conditions, such as ramps for mobility issues or braille for visual impairments. For individuals with invisible disabilities, the accommodations they need may not be immediately apparent and can be harder to secure.

For example, a student with ADHD might benefit from a quiet study environment or additional time to complete assignments. Without visible signs of their condition, these needs can easily be overlooked, leading to misunderstandings about their focus or motivation.

Similarly, someone with a chronic illness like Crohn’s disease may require frequent breaks or a flexible schedule. However, because their condition isn’t apparent, their requests for accommodation are often met with doubt or skepticism (Daley et al., 2020).

In educational environments, students with learning disabilities or mental health conditions often face obstacles in accessing the necessary support. Schools may fail to recognize the importance of accommodations, such as extra time for exams or alternative teaching approaches. As a result, these students are sometimes mistakenly seen as inattentive or underachieving, when in reality, they are managing the impact of their conditions (Stewart et al., 2020).

A Shift in Perspective: The Social Model of Disability

Fostering a more inclusive environment for individuals with invisible disabilities requires a shift in how disability is viewed. Historically, the medical model has focused on the individual’s condition as the source of limitations. However, increasing attention is being given to the social model, which suggests that barriers and societal structures, rather than the condition itself, create obstacles (Oliver, 2017).

For individuals with invisible disabilities, the social model highlights the need for environments that anticipate and include those with less obvious challenges, moving beyond mere physical modifications to more nuanced accommodations like flexible schedules and sensory-friendly spaces.

This shift in perspective challenges the assumption that only visible disabilities require accommodation and emphasizes the importance of making schools, workplaces, and public spaces more adaptable to diverse needs (Oliver, 2017; Treweek et al., 2019).

Building a Culture of Understanding

Creating a more inclusive environment involves acknowledging that disabilities come in many forms, and not all of them are outwardly visible. It requires listening to individuals’ experiences, believing them when they express their needs, and offering support without requiring proof. By broadening the understanding of what constitutes a disability, there is potential to build more inclusive spaces that accommodate a wider range of experiences.

Public awareness campaigns have made progress in highlighting the challenges faced by people with invisible disabilities, but there is still a long way to go in breaking down misconceptions surrounding these conditions (Miller, 2022). Awareness is just the beginning—what’s needed is a cultural shift that fosters understanding and accommodation.

Ultimately, recognizing the unseen is the first step toward fostering true inclusion. Invisible disabilities, though not outwardly apparent, significantly impact the lives of those who experience them. The absence of visible signs often leads to misunderstanding, doubt, and challenges in obtaining necessary accommodations, compounding the difficulties individuals already face.

Creating more inclusive environments requires rethinking the understanding of disabilities. It is crucial to acknowledge the unique experiences of those with invisible disabilities and ensure that support systems address their specific needs. By adopting a more flexible and barrier-reducing approach, spaces can become more inclusive for everyone.

Even small shifts in how invisible disabilities are perceived and addressed can have a profound effect, helping more people feel seen, understood, and supported.

References

  • Daley, D., van der Oord, S., Ferrin, M., Cortese, S., & Danckaerts, M. (2020). Practitioner Review: Current Best Practice in the Management of Adverse Effects in ADHD. Journal of Child Psychology and Psychiatry, 61(8), 818-832.
  • Haegele, J. A., & Hodge, S. R. (2016). Disability Discourse: Overview and Critiques of the Medical and Social Models. Quest, 68(2), 193-206.
  • Miller, L. (2022). The Lived Experiences of College Students with Invisible Disabilities. Disability & Society, 37(4), 679-699.
  • Oliver, M. (2017). The New Politics of Disablement. Red Globe Press.
  • Santuzzi, A. M., Waltz, P. R., Finkelstein, L. M., & Rupp, D. E. (2017). Invisible Disabilities: Unique Challenges for Employees and Organizations. Industrial and Organizational Psychology, 7(2), 204-219.
  • Treweek, S., Bevan, S., Bower, P., Campbell, M., & Craig, P. (2019). Developing and Evaluating Complex Interventions: Updating Medical Research Council Guidance to Take Account of New Methodological and Theoretical Approaches. Lancet, 374(9697), 389-395.

Championing Inclusion: Voices of Change — The Legacy of Dart & Heumann

Disability advocacy is not just about laws—it is about empathy, courage, and the power to inspire change. For Justin Dart Jr. and Judith “Judy” Heumann, two pioneers in the disability rights movement, leadership meant shifting attitudes, fostering inclusion, and giving people with disabilities a voice in shaping the future (Gostin, 2015).

During National Disability Employment Awareness Month (NDEAM), their legacies remind us that inclusion is not just a goal but a shared responsibility. Real progress takes more than compliance—it requires dismantling systemic barriers and fostering spaces where people feel valued and respected.

The Origins of Two Disability Rights Champions

Though their personal journeys were shaped by distinct experiences, both Justin Dart Jr. and Judy Heumann ultimately shared the same mission: to eliminate discrimination and foster inclusion.

Justin Dart Jr. was born into a wealthy family with political connections, giving him access to an elite education and abundant opportunities. After contracting polio at the age of 18, however, he discovered that privilege could not shield him from discrimination. When he pursued a teaching career, he was denied a license simply because he used a wheelchair (Lewis & Wolf, 2018). This experience became a turning point in his life, awakening his passion for systemic change.

Judy Heumann’s commitment to advocacy took root in her early childhood. Growing up in Brooklyn, she was barred from attending public school because her wheelchair was deemed a “fire hazard” (Bagenstos, 2020). These initial experiences of exclusion ignited her passion for civil rights. What began as frustration with unjust treatment evolved into a lifelong mission to dismantle barriers and champion equal opportunities for everyone.

From Policy to Action: Dart and Heumann’s Legacy

Justin Dart Jr.: Father of the ADA

Justin Dart Jr. believed that effective policy reform must be grounded in real experiences. His “Road to Freedom” tour took him across the United States, where he gathered stories from people with disabilities about the challenges they faced. These stories became the foundation for the Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA), passed in 1990 (Reid, 1999). For Justin Dart, the ADA was more than a law—it was a promise of equality that needed to be protected and expanded over time.

In addition to his work on the ADA, Justin Dart Jr. co-founded the American Association of People with Disabilities (AAPD) to keep disability rights at the forefront of the national agenda (Lewis & Wolf, 2018). His mantra, “Lead on,” continues to inspire ongoing advocacy and progress.

Judy Heumann: Mother of Disability Rights

Judy Heumann advanced her advocacy through legal battles and organized protests. An early notable achievement was her lawsuit against the New York Board of Education, which had denied her a teaching position due to her disability. This legal case established an important precedent for the employment of individuals with disabilities, reflecting her commitment to equal opportunities (Heumann, 2020).

In 1977, she led the San Francisco sit-in to demand the enforcement of Section 504 of the Rehabilitation Act. The 26-day occupation of a federal building became the longest in U.S. history and marked a pivotal moment for disability rights (Lewis & Wolf, 2018).

Heumann’s influence also extended into cultural spaces. Her participation in the documentary Crip Camp introduced her story to new audiences, inspiring younger generations to push for change.

Disability Rights as Human Rights

Although Judy Heumann and Justin Dart took different paths, they both believed the same core truth: disability rights are human rights. They emphasized that inclusion isn’t just a nice-to-have—it’s essential.

They also knew that passing laws alone would not create lasting change. Real progress takes more than policy; it takes a shift in how communities think and act. True inclusion means everyone is welcomed, valued, and able to contribute meaningfully. Their vision shows that stronger, more connected communities start with supporting people with disabilities.

Employment: The Next Challenge

Even with milestones like the ADA, employment remains a challenge for people with disabilities. Discrimination, inaccessible hiring practices, and a lack of accommodations create barriers that prevent access to meaningful jobs. The solution lies in going beyond legal compliance to foster inclusive environments where individuals can truly succeed.

Inclusion means more than just being physically present—it requires thoughtful design in both workplaces and culture to meet diverse needs. Concepts like Universal Design ensure that systems, processes, and spaces are accessible from the start, rather than needing adjustments later. This allows employees to participate fully, without being defined by their disabilities, reducing frustration and enhancing productivity.

Leadership is also key. Companies must go deeper than surface-level initiatives to ensure lasting inclusion. Justin Dart’s vision of inclusive employment lives on through AAPD’s work, which promotes equitable hiring practices and holds companies accountable (Heumann, 2020). Heumann’s legacy is also evident in the Workforce Innovation and Opportunity Act, which aims to expand employment opportunities for workers with disabilities (Bagenstos, 2020).

Employment is about more than earning a paycheck—it’s about dignity, purpose, and a sense of belonging. Leaders like Justin Dart and Judy Heumann understood that true equality means creating opportunities for everyone to participate fully in the workforce and beyond.

Carrying the Legacy Forward

The legacies of Justin Dart Jr. and Judy Heumann offer a blueprint for building inclusive workplaces and broader communities where everyone is respected and empowered to succeed. Their leadership shows that inclusion goes beyond legal compliance—it is about creating environments where people can contribute meaningfully and feel valued.

Justin Dart’s call to “Lead on” reflects that progress requires continuous effort, while Judy Heumann’s lifelong fight for justice demonstrates the importance of challenging exclusion at every level. Honoring their work means leading with empathy, removing barriers, and ensuring real opportunities for everyone.

While laws are essential, empathy, thoughtful design, and collective action drive lasting progress. Moving forward requires commitment from leaders and employees alike to ensure everyone has the opportunity to belong and succeed.


References

  • Bagenstos, S. R. (2020). Disability rights and the discourse of justice. SMU Law Review Forum, 73(26).
  • Fleischer, D. Z., & Zames, F. (2011). The disability rights movement: From charity to confrontation. Temple University Press.
  • Gostin, L. O. (2015). The Americans with Disabilities Act at 25: The highest expression of American values. JAMA, 313(22), 2231–2235.
  • Heumann, J. (2020). Being Heumann: An Unrepentant Memoir of a Disability Rights Activist. Beacon Press.
  • Lewis, V., & Wolf, S. (2018). Activating the past: Performing disability rights in the classroom. Journal of Literary & Cultural Disability Studies, 12, 185–201.
  • McKnight, P. D. (2023). Faculty knowledge, beliefs, and willingness to provide ADA accommodations. ProQuest Dissertations & Theses.
  • Reid, C. (1999). Justin Dart, Jr. In Enabling Lives (1st ed., p. 22). Routledge.
  • Zhang, D., Landmark, L. J., Reber, A., Hsu, H. Y., Kwok, O. M., & Benz, M. R. (2010). University faculty knowledge, beliefs, and practices in providing reasonable accommodations. Remedial and Special Education, 31(4), 276-286.

Beyond the Walk: A Journey to Inclusive Recreation and Accessibility


Wiley’s Walk began as a personal challenge—a test of my limits and a desire to discover if I could walk without assistive devices. What started as a solitary goal quickly transformed into a broader mission: advocating for accessible, inclusive environments across critical areas like health, education, employment, recreation, and community participation.

Initially, my focus was singular—walking. Yet, along the way, unexpected setbacks, such as temporary injuries and the disruptions caused by the COVID-19 pandemic, shifted my perspective. Although I didn’t achieve my defined milestone, I gained something far more valuable: a profound understanding of the crucial role recreation and fitness play in enhancing the well-being of people with disabilities.

The pandemic further highlighted systemic gaps, magnifying the urgency of this mission. Four years later, the need to create equitable access to these opportunities is more apparent—and more critical—than ever.

Inclusive Recreation: Definition and Importance

Inclusive recreation involves creating activities and spaces where individuals of all abilities can participate fully. It seeks to remove physical, cognitive, and sensory barriers to ensure that everyone can engage meaningfully in leisure experiences. For those with physical disabilities, this may include adaptive sports like wheelchair basketball, swimming with pool lifts, or hiking trails designed for mobility devices (Anderson & Heyne, 2016).

For individuals with intellectual disabilities, inclusive recreation could involve structured programs such as art or cooking classes that use visual aids or simplified instructions to promote active participation. For those with sensory disabilities, such as visual or hearing impairments, it might include features like braille signage, tactile guides on nature trails, American Sign Language (ASL) interpretation at events, or sensory-friendly movie nights with adjusted lighting and sound. These examples show how inclusive recreation accommodates diverse needs, creating environments where all individuals can enjoy the benefits of leisure and social interaction together (Anderson & Heyne, 2016).

Inclusive recreation goes beyond providing physical access; it aims to break down social and attitudinal barriers to create a welcoming environment where people with disabilities feel included and empowered. The goal is to design spaces where everyone, regardless of ability, can actively participate (Anderson & Heyne, 2016). Programs like adaptive sports leagues and fitness classes with seated exercises, such as wheelchair basketball, are great examples of this approach.

These activities promote physical movement and help foster social connections, supporting both mental and physical health. For people with disabilities, recreation is vital, emphasizing inclusion and community as much as fitness.

Lessons from the Pandemic: The Importance of Access

The COVID-19 pandemic dramatically disrupted access to recreation for everyone, but its impact on individuals with disabilities was particularly significant.

As gyms, parks, and community centers closed, many people without disabilities could easily switch to home workouts or virtual fitness classes. The transition was relatively simple for them. However, individuals with disabilities who rely on adaptive fitness programs had far fewer options. These programs offer more than just exercise—they provide specialized equipment and trained staff, making them essential for maintaining health and well-being.

When access to these programs was lost, it became more than an interruption in routine. It heightened health risks for many (Jesus et al., 2021). Physical activity is crucial for managing chronic conditions like obesity, cardiovascular disease, and diabetes, which are prevalent among individuals with disabilities. The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC, 2020.) had already noted that people with disabilities face higher rates of these conditions, and the sudden loss of fitness opportunities during the pandemic only widened these disparities (Jesus et al., 2021.)

Research reported that more than 70% of people with disabilities experienced a decline in physical activity during the pandemic (Rowland et al., 2014; Jesus et al., 2021.) For many, this decline wasn’t just about fitness; it was about managing critical health conditions. The pandemic exposed the fragility of existing supports, reinforcing how essential adaptive recreation is to maintaining well-being.

The Lingering Psychological Impact

Even years after the shutdowns, the mental health effects of losing access to these inclusive programs are still felt. For many, these activities weren’t just about exercise—they were vital for forming relationships and easing social isolation. During the pandemic, 47% of people with disabilities reported increased loneliness, compared to 28% of those without disabilities (Holm, 2022.)

The sudden stop to these programs worsened mental health challenges for those already at higher risk of loneliness. Statistics also show that adults with disabilities are three times more likely to experience symptoms of depression, and the loss of these programs exacerbated that vulnerability (CDC, 2020).

While many facilities have reopened, the psychological impact of losing these connections lingers (Holm, 2022; Luchetti et al., 2020.) The lack of both physical activity and social interaction during the pandemic has been linked to increased anxiety and depression. A 2021 report found that 53% of people with disabilities experienced increased anxiety during the pandemic due to the lack of social and recreational outlets (National Council on Disability, 2021.)

Rebuilding Stronger: Moving Toward Inclusion

The gaps in access exposed by the pandemic emphasize the need for systemic change. Although gyms, parks, and fitness centers have largely returned to normal operations, adaptive fitness programs and inclusive sports leagues have been slower to recover. This delay reflects a broader issue: the failure to adequately prioritize the needs of individuals with disabilities in public health and recreational planning.

Looking ahead, it is crucial to treat inclusive recreation as a fundamental part of public health infrastructure. Adaptive fitness programs must be seen as essential services, not optional extras. These programs are crucial for the health and well-being of individuals with disabilities. To ensure this, they should be integrated into future public health strategies.

Recreational spaces also need to be designed with accessibility in mind from the very beginning. Retrofitting existing spaces often falls short of meeting the needs of people with disabilities. Prioritizing inclusive design ensures that people with and without disabilities can participate without barriers, from the outset.

Virtual fitness platforms offer another opportunity to rethink accessibility, particularly in online spaces. By offering adaptive exercises and creating user-friendly interfaces, these platforms can play a key role in inclusive recreation. A user-friendly interface is one that is simple to navigate, with features accessible to people of all abilities. For instance, a fitness app with adjustable font sizes, voice-guided workouts, and adaptive exercise options would allow individuals with visual impairments or limited mobility to fully engage in a workout routine. Such tools can be valuable in making fitness truly inclusive

Conclusion: Prioritizing Inclusive Recreation

Four years after the pandemic began, the value of inclusive recreation has become more apparent than ever. It exposed significant gaps in access for people with disabilities, showing how easily these opportunities can be disrupted. Recreation plays a crucial role in maintaining physical health, mental well-being, and social connection. The loss of these experiences has left a lasting impact.

Communities can take meaningful steps by incorporating inclusive design into recreational spaces from the outset. Public health efforts should embrace adaptive fitness as a core service, ensuring it’s available to everyone. Virtual platforms also need to evolve to offer adaptive exercises and accessible features so that no one is left behind. The path forward is clear. The question remains: will inclusive recreation be prioritized so that everyone, regardless of ability, can benefit?

Looking ahead, it is clear that inclusive recreation isn’t just a nice-to-have—it is essential It supports physical activity, fosters connection, and promotes mental well-being. Ensuring everyone can participate is key to building more inclusive communities. Now is the time to consider how that can be made a reality.


References

  • Anderson, L., & Heyne, L. (2016). Therapeutic recreation: A person-centered approach to inclusive recreation. Sagamore Publishing.
  • Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (2020). Disability and health data system (DHDS): Health outcomes. https://www.cdc.gov/ncbddd/disabilityandhealth/dhds.html
  • Emerson, E., Fortune, N., Llewellyn, G., & Stancliffe, R. (2020). Loneliness, social support, social isolation and wellbeing among working age adults with and without disability: Cross-sectional study. Disability and Health Journal, 14(1), 100965. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.dhjo.2020.100965
  • Gallant, K., Hutchinson, S. L., Hamilton-Hinch, B., & Lauckner, H. (2015). The benefits of recreation for the recovery and social inclusion of individuals with mental illness: An integrative review. Leisure Sciences, 37(1), 1-21. https://doi.org/10.1080/01490400.2014.949966
  • Holm, M. E., Sainio, P., Parikka, S., & Koskinen, S. (2022). The effects of the COVID-19 pandemic on the psychosocial well-being of people with disabilities. Disability and health journal, 15(2), 101224. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.dhjo.2021.101224
  • Iwasaki, Y., Coyle, C. P., & Shank, J. W. (2010). Leisure as a context for active living, recovery, health, and life quality for persons with mental illness in a global context. Health Promotion International, 25(4), 483–494. https://doi.org/10.1093/heapro/daq037
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  • Luchetti, M., Lee, J. H., Aschwanden, D., Sesker, A., Strickhouser, J. E., Terracciano, A., & Sutin, A. R. (2020). The trajectory of loneliness in response to COVID-19. The American psychologist, 75(7), 897–908. https://doi.org/10.1037/amp0000690.
  • National Council on Disability (2021). COVID-19 and its impact on the disability community: A report. https://www.ncd.gov/report/an-extra/
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